When we moved into the New House, we knew that we’d need a new roof in about 3 years (that’s one year from now). We started a savings account at the credit union called The Roof Account. We haven’t saved what we were hoping – to put it in the most mild terms possible – but hey, friends and family had gotten roofs and based on what they’d paid we were feeling pretty OK about the whole thing.
OK, let’s be honest. I was feeling pretty OK about the whole thing based on one thing: the cost of my mother’s roof years ago. She didn’t need a tear-off, has less roof square footage, and didn’t do the garage at the same time like we will. I had convinced myself, nevertheless, that we would pay “not much more” than she had. Hubby was more realistic.
So, this year, a year early! we Good and Prepared Home Owners, we got a couple of estimates.
A friend of Hubby’s – not yet mentioned in this blog but whose name is Hunk Poet Electrician – got a roof a few years ago. He had called EVERY ROOFER IN THE YELLOW PAGES. He got quotes from EVERYONE WHO SHOWED UP except the ones who showed up late to give an estimate as that was Test One. So, obviously, we called the roofers he ended up using to give us an estimate.
We liked them. We liked the woman who came to deliver the estimate. She had examples of pretty roofing shingles. She remembered Hunk Poet Electrician. And at the end of the hour she spent wooing us we got to the actual estimate.
Adjusted for inflation, they were asking for the approximate cost of Noah’s Ark.
Did you know that roofing materials are based on petroleum products? I asked her if costs might go down after Labor Day (y’know, when gas prices traditionally fall). She looked at me kindly but with that crinkle around the eyes that said I was a wee bit naive.
I was so taken aback by the price that I put the papers in a drawer when she left, announced to Hubby that we were not going to talk about it again, and drank two glasses of wine. She’s said the price was good for 10 days. I was just fine to let that 10 days come and go.
The next week, Hanson’s knocked on our door out of the blue. They’re a big deal construction place around here. They announced we had a lot of roof damage and offered to come back with an estimate on a new roof. Hubby said why not. We confirmed a time and they gave us a coupon for $300 off the cost of the roof. The day before they were due to come the office called and said they needed to change times. I was not in a mood to return her customer service politeness on a par basis. She said they needed to pick a new time and would offer us a $300 off coupon for the inconvenience. I said we already had one of those, what else could they do for us? She tossed in tickets to the Renaissance Festival.
Hanson’s showed up on time and the salesman said yup, it was time for a new roof. Had it started leaking yet? Like a doctor rushing to the rescue! he would save us. “No, it’s not leaking,” I said. The roof is not close to leaking, folks.
I kinda liked the guy nevertheless. I guess mainly I liked my stunning performance during his hour and a half long sales pitch. From what I’d learned about roofs from the other saleswoman and hubby, I made a few wry, worldly comments that put me right on the top of the heap of roof buyers he was going to deal with that week. That’s right, Hanson’s, watch out, ’cause the SnakeLady is all cha-ching on roofing.
At the end of The Performance he called in to report the pricing. This was necessary because his price was good for 24 hours and they had to get it in the computer right when the estimate was given.
24 hours. Like people aren’t going to get more than one estimate when buying the modern-day equivalent of Noah’s Ark. Like Hubby and the SnakeLady are going to be pressured by some guy they’d met an hour and a half ago.
At some point during the phone conversation he gave a Secret Signal to the person on the other end and discounted shingles magically appeared. A most unfortunate customer had bought the same shingles we were looking at for their garage but the garage had burned down before the roof went on. Would we care to purchase these shingles at a discount? We’d have to move faster than 24 hours, though, these shingles would go to the first customer who snapped them up. They could go in the next 10 minutes. There were a dozen salesman in houses like ours right then.
I wanted to ask, How big was his garage that said Unfortunate Customer had needed enough shingles to cover what would be our entire ranch house plus our attached two car garage? I said nothing. I didn’t feel wry and worldly but a little dirty now. Rode hard and put away wet, Hubby said.
I looked at his price. It was still higher than the other place. We wished him a good evening.
I didn’t need a glass of wine that night. Hubby and I will do what we planned before we got the estimates: wait a year. But damn, we are not in a good mood about it.
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