6. Brooks states that the Victorians were inarticulate about sex and we are inarticulate about morality – that we have lost our moral vocabularly. What are the consequences of being morally inarticulate?
Let me pause for a moment to introduce you to my friend Dragon, who figures rather prominently in this Road to Character series, as well as in my life.
Dragon and I met in book club about nine years ago. Our husbands were friends and colleagues, but that was the first time we’d met. I knew right away that I wanted to be friends with her: she was funny, clever, well-educated, a careful thinker, and sophisticated about books & reading. She has a Master of Fine Arts and her art form is poetry.
She is also very down-to-earth and has a lot of qualities I admire (and that are hard to find). She never lies – which means she’s good at talking about sensitive issues. She’s loyal. She values female friendships, and before she was widowed, she balanced that well with her marriage.
Dragon and I hosted a dinner party for almost a dozen book club members at an East Lansing standard called Coral Gables after the formal Character discussion where conversation continued. And she and I have spent a lot of time before and since then discussing these questions, and the implications of our answers.
In any case, I wanted to pause for a moment to describe her as I will continue to introduce some of these questions with her opinions – where we agree and where we disagree – and I thought you might like to know who this mysterious figure is in my life. Also, for this question we agree almost entirely (at first) and I can’t remember who exactly said what so it’s safest if I just step aside and credit her with the following:
When we are inarticulate about morality, we are unable to grapple with moral concepts – individually or collectively. We can’t talk coherently about morality, or properly define it. Furthermore, we are unable to teach it to future generations. We end up dependent on an infantile reliance on human innocence followed by a reliance on moral romanticism because we know nothing else. And according to Dragon, that’s not going to work because she doesn’t believe that people have a core of flawless inner goodness that can be relied on to lead a moral life.
My example of what this lack of articulation can feel like comes in the form of a story about my three year old nephew. One day he woke up and he was coming down with a cold. Unfortunately, his parents didn’t recognize the warning signs and sent him to daycare. By the end of the day, the toddler was a complete emotional disaster. They got him home and tried to calm him down but he couldn’t stop crying.
“It’s OK, buddy,” my brother told his son, “Everything is fine now. You’re home and safe and you’re going to feel better soon. There’s nothing to cry about. You can stop now.”
“But I don’t know how!” The toddler wailed, and cried on.
To me, this is what a morally inarticulate society resembles. When I see gun violence on the rise, I don’t think: “This is a second amendment issue.” I think: this is a matter of not being morally articulate about the value of life and community safety, at the most basic level. We can’t agree on even common-sense forms of scaling back the proliferation of guns. When I see white nationalism on the rise in the US, I don’t think: “Well, everyone is entitled to their own opinion.” I think: this is 70 years of hard work being undone and a lack of being morally articulate about the fact that we all have a responsibility to respect one another. A moral responsibility.
This is our society, crying and unable to comfort itself.
We’re overwhelmed by the weighty matters of life without the comfort of concepts and vocabulary and rituals and relationships and community that make sense of the most important decisions we make. Our most secret beliefs and actions that result in our public lives.
This is why I seek organized religion.
I’m not saying you need organized religion to be ethical. Hey, Dragon is an agnostic and she’s one of the most moral people I know. I wouldn’t even try to sell you on my religion. But I am saying that I believe that organized religion has particular and unique value. That it can give adherents emotional treasure almost behind description. Access to God’s comfort within an ethical structure.
Yeah, that was Snakelady going all religious on you. I really am doing my best to get through more than a dozen questions about ethics without talking about religion, and by being as broad-minded as possible. But the fact of the matter is that I am a religious person and I do worry about my standing before God. I do believe that my actions matter – not just to my family and friends, not just to the people I interact with, not just to the law – but to God. I do believe that what I believe matters – to God. And I can feel the presence of God in my life. So, I thank you for a little room to get churchy when threatened with the concept of a morally inarticulate society.
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