Sensible shoes are no laughing matter

I have the most boring health problem imaginable: bone spurs and arthritis in my right foot. Yawn. Few people know this about me. Who wants to hear about my feet? No one. Not even me. I’m not even willing to think about my feet, as the following story so clearly demonstrates.

My sister-in-law introduced me to an SAS shoestore during a trip to Milwaukee years ago. So sensible! The entire line, from boots to sandals, appeals to those favoring extreme comfort in their footwear. I do have a pair of patent leather SAS flats with bows, and even those feel good. People who need super cute or cheap, fashionable shoes do not think of SAS first. People with bone spurs and arthritis? Baby, we’re all over their entire line.

Five years ago I bought a pair of shoes that SAS advertises, as, I kid you not, “perfect for a trip to the library.” I bought them in W for Wide as anything snug over the top of my foot hurts. They felt comfortable, and so, obviously, they were the perfect size. They cost more than I’d ever paid for shoes before, and so, obviously, they were high quality.

My foot continued to hurt, particularly in winter. I spoke to a podiatrist about it once. He told me that arthritis doesn’t get better with age and is worse in cold weather. He made me a set of orthotics (double yawn). I put them in my library shoes and wore them year-round for the next five years. I don’t buy a lot of shoes.

This summer I took to dresses and (SAS) sandals every day. My feet felt great! But I didn’t even notice. As we got closer to fall, it occurred to me that I’d be wearing pants more frequently again, and hence my library shoes. I saw them peaking out from beneath my dresser. They were pretty scuffed. Hmm, I thought, time for a replacement pair. I called the store and re-ordered the exact same thing.

After all, they were: wide, comfortable, high quality, and fit well with my orthotics.

I put them on the first day and by the time I got out of work my foot ached like an SOB. I literally hobbled around my house all night.

However, the shoes were: wide! comfortable! high quality! and fit well with my orthotics!

I wore them a second day. I had to put on a lidocaine rub in the evening. My feelings about the shoes changed not a jot. “The fall must be coming,” I decided.

But I went back to the sandals on Day 3, side-stepping the issue neatly while the warm weather held.

I decided to order another pair of SAS. Ankle boots. A nod to current fashions which I normally ignore. This time I ordered them in double wide. I was sure they wouldn’t fit. After all, I’d never worn double wide shoes in my 47 years. Feet don’t change, do they? But those two days had left an impression. That impression didn’t come to full consciousness but it did needle its way into my new purchase.

After two days of wearing double wide boots that don’t cause me pain, it finally, finally, finally occurred to me that I’d been wearing the wrong shoes for five years. The same pair of wrong shoes for five years. I’d taken Advil for the pain innumerable times. Gone through expensive compounds of Ketaprofen which my insurance doesn’t cover and only one pharmacy in town could make for me. Settled for lidocaine ointment when I had to. For five years. An ailment so boring that almost no one knows about it. But it interfered with my life.

I still have a bone spur, and arthritis, and my foot still hurts sometimes. But it doesn’t hurt every day.

Have I mentioned lately that I have a Master’s degree? Book learning. It ain’t everything. Sometimes, it’s nothing at all.