When I first started attending UU Lansing, I said I was interested in finding a community where I could express kindess in a robust enviornment of good will. And I found that at UU.
But after a year, there are some important things missing, too. Namely, a common understanding of God. At the very least a belief that there is a God.
I’m not willing to give up any of the good things that I’ve found at UU. I don’t want to try to find a home in a socially or politically conservative environment. It would seriously bother me to go to church with a group of people who believed that God ordained that the LBGT community is “sinful” or that women are in some way just a little bit less than men (for instance, by not embracing women in leadership roles in the church).
What do I need in terms of theology? I need a basic understanding that God exists. That’s a pretty low bar but it’s where I’m starting.
And what about Jesus? I think I’d like to come to peace with Jesus. To an appreciation for him as a prophet. I’m pretty sure the churches I’ll be visiting with Marie will be happy to accommodate me on that front.
I think for the next six months I will consider myself “open and searching” with some important caveats and requirements. For the past year, I’ve considered myself open to exploring UU Lansing-mostly the experience of going to church every week and finding a place for myself in the congregation. Now I’m branching out.
So, here’s what I’m looking for:
- A common belief about the existence of God
- An appreciation for Jesus
- A friendly congregation that welcomes newcomers and accepts seekers (like me)
- An “open and affirming” stance about the LGBT community
- A feminist bent. Bottom line: they have to accept women as ministers and in leadership roles although currently having a female minister is not a requirement.
- I don’t want to hear politics from the pulpit.
- A common understanding of, and appreciation for, science, in the congregation. Specifically, acceptance of the scientific concepts of evolution and climate change.
- Right now I’m not particularly fired up about social justice or environmentalism but I have been in the past, expect to be in the future, and would like to see avenues to this at my church.
- Service. Service. Service. I want to see service to the community.
- Bonus points for: communal prayer and an excellent choir
And let me segue to another, related topic. Being Muslim isn’t easy. It’s hard to belong to a religion that is a minority faith in America. Particularly when you can’t, in good conscience, defend their record on women or family matters. When the faith you espouse is in direct contradiction to some of your most important secular values. Monotheism is important to me. So is the basic human right of a woman to divorce her husband. To seek custody of her children. To not be relegated to the back of the room in her place of worship.
If I won’t accept those things from a Christian church, why am I willing to continue to call myself a Muslim?
That’s complicated, but basically I believe that Muhammad was a prophet of God and I find a lot of beauty and goodness in Islamic traditions and practices. But not in all of them and that’s where it gets complicated. I’m compromising. A lot. And I keep coming back to the question: if I wouldn’t accept this behavior, or that attitude, from a Christian church, why am I accepting it from the Muslim faith? Right now I can’t answer that.
And there’s one more thing I should include in a list of items I’m looking for during this period of exploration. I’m not particularly proud of this but I’m going to say it anyway. I’m looking for a place that is mainstream. I’ve had 30 years of being in a minority religion in America and, within that religion, of being a minority congregant. It’s been difficult and I don’t want to jump from the frying pan into the fire.
I hear that Buddhists are great when it comes to LGBT issues. That’s wonderful and good for them but I’m not becoming a Buddhist even though I regularly practice mindfulness. I can appreciate a practice without going all in. Belief-O-Matic consistently tells me that Reformed Judaism is right up my alley. Granted, I’m uber on the monotheism front, but I don’t want to feel like I’m co-opting another culture. I’ve heard it said that the Ba’hais have a lot in common with Islam but might be more palatable. Seriously? I’m going to jump from one of the worlds major religions to an off-shoot?
No to all of it. I once read about an American who moved to Tibet and tried to join a monastery. He was sent away and told to go home and make a place for himself in his own religious tradition.
I want a culturally comfortable place to worship God. I’ve never believed that there is only one path to God. I’ve always respected the many and varying worldwide paths to God. I’m going to apply some of that acceptance to the churches I visit with Marie. I’m also going to work on the idea of forgiving myself for simply wanting to fit in.
Plum Librarian LLC 